Approaching Single Motherhood
By Lakeea Lowry
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Being a mom or parent for that matter; is quite far one of the most difficult positions in life ever. Those of us, who are single moms, are held to an even higher standard, which can be doubly challenging.

Many of the circumstances or challenges that we face throughout the course of our lives often leave us with a thirst a complete yearning for more; change, definition, and gratification. Through lessons learned we seek the love of a higher force.

Many of the lessons I have learned early on in my life, were direct consequences of poor decisions I made. Many of these decisions were contributing factors to my position as a single mother. God's love is a promised and unconditional love; sometimes exhibited harsh enough to prevent us from making poor choices a second time around. Acceptance of God's will is a sure sign of growth and maturity. I have accepted God's will, but often those around us are not as quick to forgive and practice acceptance.

Growing up as a young woman in Brooklyn, New York, I was faced early on with challenges that far succeeded my mental, physical, social ability, and understanding. These circumstances allowed me an opportunity to view the world from a different respective than the majority of my peers. Through the inspiration and encouragement of a good friend, I was led to the Catholic faith. I accepted God and all of his many teachings; and I became comforted by the hope that the Catholic faith instilled upon me. As my faith began to grow, a profound expectation of Catholic Christians around me began to grow as well.

Disappointment, fear and inadequacy began to set in as I embarked upon my journey as a single mother. I felt I was surrounded by a society in which I had to prove my ability and self worth to those around me. I suddenly no longer felt the comfort, security and reassurance of my Catholic family, peers, parish, or college community. As I began to piece the puzzle together, early on, lesson #1: faith is of God, and should not be embedded into the fabric of simple man. I vowed this is a lesson of life I would instill upon my child by any means necessary.

Twelve years later, still a practicing catholic, my daughter has been an extreme blessing to me; and a constant source of inspiration throughout the journey's of my life.

I have worked endlessly to instill upon her the morals and lessons I have learned in collaboration with that of the Catholic faith she has been reared in.

It is my sincere hope that those within the Catholic community will begin to look at and accept single mothers with great compassion and love. I often consider single motherhood a vocation. My challenges are increased everyday as I continue to raise my daughter in a Catholic Christian household; but I am constantly challenged by the ways of our secular society. Quite often my daughter struggles with why she has to be "different" as well. I earnestly find myself, with tears in my eyes, reminding my daughter that "Jesus" was considered different also, and that we should look to him for peace and understanding, always.

"In the sixth month, God sent the angel Gabriel to Nazareth, a town in Galilee, to a virgin pledged to be married to a man named Joseph, a descendant of David. The virgin's name was Mary. The angel went to her and said, "Greetings, you who are highly favored! The Lord is with you." Mary was greatly troubled at his words and wondered what kind of greeting this might be. But the angel said to her, "Do not be afraid, Mary, you have found favor with God. You will be with child and give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus. He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of his father David, and he will reign over the house of Jacob forever; his kingdom will never end." "How will this be," Mary asked the angel, "since I am a virgin?" The angel answered, "The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you, so the holy one to be born will be called the Son of God. Even Elizabeth your relative is going to have a child in her old age, and she who was said to be barren is in her sixth month. For nothing is impossible with God." "I am the Lord's servant," Mary answered. "May it be to me as you have said." Then the angel left her. " Luke 1:26-38

As Catholic Christians we must remember, Mary was also unwed when she conceived our lord and savior. Wearing many hats, she was a widow and single mother. Ultimately, she lost her only son! Single mothers should not be scrutinized, rather loved and embraced within our respective communities.

My grandmother often proclaimed "It takes a village to raise a child." Our children are gifts. Motherhood is synonymous with unconditional love, sacrifice and trust. We especially, as single mothers must set a prime example for our children. An example of diligence, forgiveness, practice of faith, citizenship, and unconditional love. Our Catholic Christian community should serve as a liaison bridging faith and tradition together; serving as a good supportive mechanism. God's family is displayed in many forms. Our children are a permanent mirrored reflection of our constant sacrifices, prayers, and faith in approaching single motherhood.