In August of 2009, my life was about to change… what
initially seemed to be a change for the worst eventually became a change for the
best. I had a likely stomach virus with fatigue and stomach pain. After about
five days, the symptoms improved but then became progressively worse. I went to
an urgent care office over the weekend and was started on medication to treat
the intense abdominal cramps. Perhaps the medication helped to reduce the
intensity of the pain but it surely did not prevent it. After a number of weeks,
the intermittent pain was associated with other gastrointestinal symptoms. Due
to it becoming uncomfortable to eat from the pain, which seemed to sometimes
intensify after meals, I lost approximately ten pounds. Considering I was
already petite, this was not ideal and quite concerning to my treating
physicians. The symptoms progressed from the intermittent cramping to include
low back pain, arthritic-like hip pain, constipation, and bloating. A variety of
specialists became involved in trying to determine the underlying cause of these
symptoms in an otherwise healthy 38 year old female. After seeing an urologist,
gynecologist, and gastroenterologist, there still was no conclusive reason for
the intensity of my symptoms. I ended up in the hospital for three days after
having intractable abdominal pain. Numerous scans, x-rays, procedures, and blood
work still did not shine any light on the problem.
In the midst of all of this over a 3 month time
span, I limited my schedule to just working as a psychiatrist during the day and
coming home in the evenings. I no longer had the energy or the mental strength
to assist in teaching weekly Bible study, to play tennis, or to finish work
after hours. My days were and continue to be spent in my important ministry of
being a mother to my three beautiful children and wife to my dedicated husband.
I knew the Lord was calling me to a different place but I didn't know where. In
the depths of the storm, it took all of me to thank Him for what He was working
out through me. After praying and asking others to pray with me for insight into
the source of my illness, my primary care physician had a suggestion. He wanted
to look into food sensitivity. Thanks to his persistence and the Lord guiding
him into where to go, the answer finally became clear in the middle of December,
four months after my initial symptoms. The blood results showed that I had a
range of mild to severe intolerance to a number of foods, seasonings and fat
sources. My immune system would see the various items as toxic and created the
symptoms I had.
Ten months later, life is much simpler. The GI
symptoms usually are preventable based on my diet which is monitored daily. I
have tried to stay away from the severe and moderate intolerant foods/seasonings
for a number of months in hope that my immune system no longer sees them as
foreign. After worrying about not being able to gain weight steadily, I began to
trust God had brought me to this place and would take care of me through it. In
stepping back, I could see how the Lord calls our lives to order, an order we
can't always understand. And not just any order, but a holy order. We are made
in the image and likeness of our Lord. Thus, the Lord is always finding ways to
purify and prune us such that His perfection can shine forth in us all. It's not
enough then to be stripped of physical impurities in our lives as He so
drastically has done in my life, but we must look deep into ourselves to see
where else we can become more like Him. Is the Lord calling you to let go of
your worries, fears, anxieties? Are you worried about how your bills will get
paid in this ever-changing economy? Are you worried about who you will marry?
Are you worried about what your peers think about you? Do you fear being able to
let go of the drug addiction, gambling, or even fornication? Matthew 6:33-34
says, "But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things
will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for
tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."
Through this storm, I have heard the Lord definitely
say he desires us to be pure like Him, not just in body but in thought, words,
and actions. In Ephesians 5:1-5, Paul elaborates on this by saying, 1 Be
imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children 2 and live a life of love,
just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and
sacrifice to God. 3 But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual
immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper
for God's holy people. 4 Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse
joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving. 5 For of this you can
be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person - such a man is an idolater - has
any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God.
The Lord wants us all to be called home to be with
Him when our time on this earth ends. May we not miss what the Lord is asking us
to cleanse us from, and may we turn to His voice to heed to His request. May
your storm be your victory when it's all said and done.
